Little letters

Dear Columbus,

If you could do it all over again, please fill the Nina with vodka, the Pinta with gin and the Santa Maria with whiskey. That way my place of employment would deem it suitable to let us have the day off in celebration of your accomplishments.

Dear Mom,

Thanks for replacing my broken coffee pot. It was nice being able to finally make my own coffee again this morning. When I jokingly asked how long you thought this one would last, it made me smile that you guessed it would be around for awhile, because you had a feeling my next relationship would be a good one.

Love you!

Dear Indy,

Thank you for hosting a food truck festival Friday evening, that we randomly stumbled upon. I really love our downtown and the way you always have little surprises up your sleeve like 15someodd mobile yummies all parked in one lot.

Dear Chase Bank,

You’re on my shit list. I’ll just leave it at that for now. Why you are punishing me for paying down my car loan is beyond my comprehension!?


Dear bloggers who have Captcha enabled,
You guys are on my shit list too. Can you please take it off? I don't think there is anything more annoying.
Although having no email address linked to your blog comes in close 2nd.

Dear Russell,

Even though you do many things that make me giggle, your newfound ritual of peeing on the floor every other morning is not gonna fly. Don’t make me take you back to where you came from.

Dear guy-I-had-a -crush-on-in-high-school-who-now-manages-an-ATT-store,

I’m glad we never dated in HS because it would have probably been a bad breakup and then you would not be nice and remember that I mentioned I wanted a white iPhone so you randomly reserved one for me. You kinda rock and I cannot wait to come pick it up Friday!

Dear girlfriendcookies,

You were a big hit at tailgating, my cousin said you tasted like the one’s Elvis made. Well, that’s what we thought he said but apparently he meant “elves”, as in Keebler.

Dear jello shots,

You were also a big hit at tailgating. But then again, you always are. I think there may have been a few too many of you though, we all got pretty happy there towards game time.

Dear soccer,

I used to think you were the worst sport ever. After this weekend I may have a different opinion. I guess you aren’t SO bad.

Dear driveway-sitting-neighbors,

You guys have now adorned your driveway with one of those CocaCola plastic gas station coolers. Really? REALLY? Stay classy neighbors, stay classy.

Dear tires,

Can you magically grow some new tread? Please? I priced your replacements out last week and it's gonna cost me nearly a thousand bucks... sos.

Dear birthday,

You’re next week… and I’m not really looking forward to you. 24 just seems so old to me, compared to 23 and I don’t think I’m ready for it. Can you hold off for a few more months? 

Dear blog,
Where did all these new readers come from?! I happened to notice there's nearly 300 of you guys?! Sheesh I feel serious pressure to actually write something decent one of these days ;)