Track trashin'

It would be a travesty to let the month of May pass without talking about my adoration for being tracktrash.

Let's momentarily be honest. I don't really follow racing, had I not seen the constant heckling of Ashley Judd on twitter during the 500 Awards Banquet I probably couldnt have even told you Dario won the race Sunday.

BUT... but... May in Indy is my very favorite time of the year simply because it's FUN. There is always SOMETHING going on somewhere.

So when you wake up on a Saturday afternoon with not much on the agenda, this is what you do...

1) go pick up your best friend and pack a cooler so full you have to put a 5 foot inflatable shark on top to keep it closed in the car.

2) wander around the Indianapolis Motor Speedway for a few hours in weather so hot your shoes are sticking to the asphalt. Find race-industry-employed friends and use them for their air-conditioning found only in the garage areas.

3) decide you started the day a little early, and proceed to the infield lawn to take a nap

4) Since it's nearly 6pm and the track is closing, you pack up and head out. Listening only to quintessential 'merica tunes.

5) Talk those friends from earlier into taking you out to dinner. Where they proceed to find themselves HILARIOUS and tell the waiter you are "very single", and he creeps on you the ENTIRE dinner, while they fake being 'in love'

6) Duck out of the restaurant after leaving a fake number, and proceed onto race track number two for the day. To watch a certain cute boy race that evening.

7) Don't forget to Pabby!

8) Continue to lighten the cooler load

9) Finish off the night with a round of grandstand grandslam. Until someone (ahhem myself) pops the Lightening McQueen ball by hitting it onto the track.

Kachow.