To my future mister, I promise...

I promise to take an obnoxious amount of photos of us. And of you. And of cute things you do/say. And occasionally I promise to exploit them on the blog, or other various forms of social media. FOR POSTERITY'S SAKE


I promise you anytime you're bummed, I'll be the first one cracking dumb jokes and making silly faces trying to get you to crack a smile.


I promise you that if a laugh isn't what you need, I'll be there to offer the biggest hug, a hand to hold, an ear to listen, and a shoulder to cry on. And then I'll tell you that you owe me a new shirt due to snot stains.


I promise you will never be hungry. My love of cooking is only just beginning, and baking has always been my favorite pastime. I promise I'll occasionally make healthy food too, so we don't become lard-asses.


On that note I promise you'll never be thirsty. I have enough liquor in my house to allow a family of 10 to survive a decade long Prohibition.


I promise I won't whine about the action/drama flicks you pick up from Redbox for date night. It's hard to whine when I fall asleep 20 minutes into any movie.


I promise you will rarely have to see me in the same outfit twice. I can't help that I excel at shopping, I'm willing to bet you won't ever have to wear the same thing twice ever either.


I promise we will never be on time to anything. But you bet your ass you better be ready ahead of time. It's expected that you'll have to wait on me... but you turning the tables is just unacceptable.


I promise the house will never be completely spotless, the laundry will rarely ever be completely put away, and the sink will probably have dishes in it. I think it's important to share chores, I don't want to take any of the joy of a "achieving a clean home" away from you.


I promise I'll be your best partner in crime, egging you on whether it be karaoke, shots, or the Blackjack table. But don't worry... I'll make sure you don't get TOO out of control, and remind you when you're being a dumbass/brokeass/drunkass.


I promise you will never be bored. Whether I'm dragging you to a country concert, hanging on your arm at a sporting event, or snuggling on your shoulder on a long flight. We'll have adventures. I promise if you aren't already broke, we'll make a dent in that together. (Hey, can't take it with you when you go.)


I promise to argue every major world event with you, place all my best conspiracy theories on the table, and explain to you all the Googling I geekily did leading up to those viewpoints. I'll also remind why you're wrong, if/when I'm clearly right.


I promise to spoil you with surprises and gifts. Do onto others as you would like others to do onto you.


I promise to give you headaches, to piss you off, to wear you out, and probably give you no choice but to drive around aimlessly for hours on end to clear your head. I promise we'll make mistakes, together. And we'll learn. I promise there will be times we're so damn sure we hate each other but I promise I will make you break a smile.  I promise we'll get through the tough times, and we'll have the best of good times.  I promise I'll be your best right hand lady, and I promise to never hurt you and love you with all my heart.

I pinky promise.